Aug 20th

Today I got to speak to the doctor about Layla's brain scan. She said that there is not any new bleeding and that the blood is clotting so it can eventually drain. There are three ventricles in the brain, and the one in the middle is where all the blood was pooling. The blood needed to drain in order to relieve pressure on the brain. This is such good news, but we will still need to follow up with brain scans until all the blood is flowing normally around her tiny brain.

They have been increasing her feeding by 1 cc every 12 hours, so she is now up to 12cc every 3 hours. They have her on a feeding machine that regulates the flow of food for a period of 1/2 hour. This will give her tummy time to adjust to the larger amounts of food that she is expected to consume. She is able to digest all her feedings, so they will keep increasing until she gets to about 18cc. They will then gradually increase at a slower rate.

She is gaining about 10 grams a day and sometimes more. She is still looking a little skinny for right now, but I know it won't be long before I notice her body plumping up! I can't wait. They tell me it will be at least another 6-8 weeks before I can feed her from my breast. It shouldn't be long before I am able to feed her from my arm.

Layla stays awake when she is getting her diaper changed and temperature taken. She opens her eyes and looks around. She can move her head, so she is super nosey. She hears my voice, and I know she can tell who I am. Once she has her milk, it's all over -- she settles down and goes right back to her peaceful sleeping that she does for most of the day.

Layla is known for being quite fiesty. The more she fights, the better she will be. They tell me she will get stronger everyday, but I still have to see it to believe it. I can see the most subtle changes in her because I go everyday.  I look at her pictures and think how awesome God is for allowing such a tiny little girl to grow and thrive outside of her mother's womb. She has come a long way in the 3 weeks that she has been here. I know it seems like time has just flown by, but I assure you I have lived every second of time that has past.

Getting through each day is a challenge, but I just do it. Leaving your baby in a NICU bed is a fight from within I care not to do, especially on a daily basis. Leaving Layla everyday is the hardest thing to do. Some battles and struggles come with the small victories. She grows stronger and my will grows weaker. I know balance will come.

Love and prayers for My Sweet Layla
Kathleen